I don't like being reminded...

I don't...I don't like being reminded.  I forget things...I put things off...and sometimes I just don't want to do it.  That's when I'm given reminders by people or life.  I recently received such a reminder...and it was a tough one to take.

Allow me to start at the beginning...

We all have done it, and we all do it.  We let work, school, and other activities take our time away from our families and friends.  We also have friends, relatives, classmates, etc. that we have reconnected with through any number of social media sites.  We try our best to stay in touch everyone...to call, write or visit...but some how, for some reason, we either forget or just simply fail to do so.  And how often are we reminded this?  And when we are, what is our go-to excuse and our go-to answer?  "I'm just too busy right now" and "I'll do it tomorrow."  Sound familiar?

I am beyond guilty of this.  I have the best intentions...but not the best follow-up actions.  This is where my little reminders come in.  Sometimes, the reminders are subtle, but other times they are more, shall we say, "sucker punches."  Whatever their form, they serve to remind me just how important the people in my life are, just how important it is to let them know what they mean to me, and just how important it is to do things today and not put them off until tomorrow...because tomorrow isn't guaranteed...and you may never have the chance again.

Yesterday, I received a "sucker-punch" reminder.  Yesterday, I lost a long-time friend from grade/middle school.  We grew up together, went to church together, spent our summers together, etc.  Our families were even friends...my Mom knows his Mom well and went to school with his Dad, and our grandparents were also very good friends.  I moved away just before High School, and we lost touch.  A few years ago, we reconnected on FB...something for which I will be forever grateful.  We kept in touch fairly well, but the last few months we didn't talk as much.  I kept looking at his number in my phone, or at his name on my FB page, and thinking that I needed to call, text, message...something.  But I never did.  On my trip back home last month, I even thought about making a detour and swinging by to see him.  But I didn't.  Now, I will never get a chance to make that call, send that message, or make that detour...and oh how I regret that now.

I hate being reminded about things that I put off or forget...especially when those reminders are permanent.  Now, when I get a reminder and can act on it, I will do my best to do so...to call, write, or spend time with those in my life...because something that I hate more than a reminder...is having to live with the regret.

I will miss you, my friend...but I will never forget you.

Another Day in Paradise...

Another day...another week...nearly another month...and nearly another summer is in the books.  Where does the time go?  My wife is already starting back in her classroom, and my daughter will soon be starting the 7th grade.  Unfortunately, we get so tied up with every day things...jobs, taking care of the kids, taking care of our homes, running here, running there, etc....that we lose track of time, and before we know it, our time is gone.  We also tend to take what we have for granted.  We think that things will make us happy.  We place more importance on the "what" rather than the "who" in our lives, replacing all important relationships with material possessions.  Combine these two...spending all our time fixated on getting bigger, better and newer things...and you have a toxic combination.  Unfortunately, this is, more and more, becoming the norm in or society.  And the excuse we use more and more..."I want to give my kids more than what I had."  Really?  How about giving your kids a loving, caring family that actually spends time together.  That will go farther than a new iPad or the latest shoes.

I, unfortunately, am just as guilty of this as the next guy...if not more so.  Times were not always the easiest, financially, in my family growing up, so I definitely try to over compensate when it comes to providing for my daughter.  And I know I don't always appreciate what I have been blessed with in my life.  In the Marines and Navy, we had a saying..."Just another day in paradise...where every day is a vacation, every paycheck is a bonus, and every meal is a feast."  This was meant to be a sarcastic reference towards life in the military, but as I think about it today, I realize just how true this statement is.  Allow me to elaborate...

"Just another day in paradise...where every day is a vacation..." - Each day is not going to be easy, each day is not going to be one that we look back and say "Man, I wish I could do that again,"  and most importantly, each day is not guaranteed.  For some, especially those dealing with a serious, life-threatening illness, each day is truly a blessing, and is, I imagine, most likely viewed and appreciated like most people think of their vacation days...something that they cherish and never want to end.

"...every paycheck is a bonus..." - It's no secret that our economy is not what it once was (but that's a topic for another time).  For many, making ends meet is a struggle.  For some, work has been non-existent for some time, as has been the ability to support their family.  So when a paycheck finally does come, it can feel like a bonus.  I spent some time on the unemployed list a number of years ago...long before our economic downturn.  Fortunately, I wasn't unemployed long, but the time I was was very difficult and stressful.  Not knowing how our bills would be paid, how we would feed our family, etc. definitely took it's toll on me.  So when I finally did get a job, and that first paycheck, it felt like I had won the lottery.  I can only imagine how it would feel after being unemployed for months, or years.

"...and every meal is a feast." - Along the same lines, for those who have little or nothing, any time they are able to provide a meal for their families, no matter how big or small it may be, it might as well be a feast.

I'm trying more and more to focus on being thankful for what I have been given in my life.  God has truly blessed me with more than I deserve.  Instead of complaining about my commute, I am thankful for my job.  Instead of complaining about all the work I need to get done around the house, I am thankful for my wonderful home.  Instead of complaining that I don't have a newer car, or a car more along the lines of what I think I need, I am thankful that my wife and I both have dependable vehicles.  I could go on and on...

I also need to be sure to help show my daughter just how blessed she is, especially when she starts complaining that she doesn't have the latest gadget, gizmo or fashion.  I understand that the world is working on her, telling her that she needs more...but I need to help remind her that God has already given her everything she needs, and more...and all we need to do is to stop, look around, and enjoy yet another day in our own paradise.

Putting things into perspective...

Early this morning...around 2 a.m. to be more precise...as I laid in bed trying to sleep, it dawned on me what today is...so I posted the following status on my Facebook page:

"3 years ago today (one day after Saddam Hussein invaded Kuwait), I entered the Military Enlisted Processing Station (or MEPS) in Amarillo, TX. 23 years ago today, I raised my right hand and swore an oath to support and defend the Constitution of the United States...against ALL enemies...foreign AND domestic. Today, as my military career comes to a close, that oath is just as important to me as it was 23 years ago...and though I may no longer serve, I will always honor that oath. I am proud and honored to have served...and I thank those who have served, and who still are today. May God bless you all."

When I wrote this, I felt like I was simply rambling...sharing what I considered to be a milestone in my life.  I in no way expected the outpouring of such wonderful comments.  There were numerous "Thank you for your service" comments, as well as some other, more personal, comments...such as:

"You brought me to tears!  We need a lot more people like you in this world!  Love ya man!"

and

"Thanks Fellow Vet.  Congrats on a great career.  Through good time and bad, we both served.  Something that not everyone will do."

and

"Your heart has always been as big as Texas and you have always chosen to fill it with the love of God, family and country.  You still make my heart melt."

and

"Thank you VERY MUCH for your service to our country.  It's people like you, who serve in the military, that keep our country safe & that help us to remain the greatest country on earth!"

Reading these comments, I was honored...I was humbled...I was utterly speechless.  With everything that I fight through on a personal level each and every day, I felt far from deserving of these kind words.  But the comment that really stopped me in my tracks...and brought me to tears...was one posted by my own daughter.  She wrote:

"Thank you so much for everything you did and still do today!!!  You are one amazing father!!!!  I couldn't have asked for anyone better!!!  Thank you Mombee [my mother] for having such an amazing son!!!  He has done so much for my mom, the country and me!!!  I am very blessed to have your son as a father.  I love you daddy!!!!!!!!!!!! <3 <3 <3"

Wow!  It took me a while to catch my breath.  Words cannot express the pride, gratitude, and love that I feel every time I read that.

Now, jump to this evening at church.  We had a guest speaker this evening, and he started the service with a little exercise.  Allow me to demonstrate...

The question was asked...What are some of your life roles?  I immediately thought of "Dad" and "husband" and "friend" and "son" and "employee"...just to name a few.

The next question asked was...What are some adjectives that you would use to describe your roles?  This got a little harder.  I wanted to say "good" and "loyal" and "trustworthy" and "honest" and "dependable"...but I started to feel a bit like I was bragging...and it was sounding eerily similar to the Boy Scout motto.  :)

The next couple of questions asked were more rhetorical in nature...Is this where you find your identity?  Is this where you find your worth?  Is this what defines you?  Man, talking about hitting close to home.  I tendency to strive to be a good person, someone that people can trust and come to for help.  Reading my daughter's comment on my status made me feel proud because she saw me as a good father and was proud of what I had done.  But have I focused too much on MY being and MY doing?  Am I showing my daughter that it is more important what others thank of you than what God sees in you?  Am I doing enough to show her God's ways and not MY ways?

Reading my daughter's comment today put into perspective my focus and goals.  The service tonight put into perspective just how much I rely on these worldly aspects of my life...and just how much they take away from what should be my true focus and goal...my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ...  

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith...." (Hebrews 12:1-2)

I also need to focus on pointing my daughter towards Him as well...

"Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it." (Proverbs 22:6)

It's amazing how God works sometimes...using a child and a guest speaker to help put things back into perspective...the correct perspective.